It’s not fun to say goodbye.
In the nine and a half years that Phil and I have been married, goodbyes have been rare. As we arrived at the airport to drop him off for a recent business trip, I found myself feeling a little sad…and tired. Getting up at 3:15 in the morning tends to produce a weary sort of sadness.
As we pulled up to the curb at the terminal, another car was parked in front of us. A couple stood next to it saying goodbye. As I prepared myself to say goodbye to my husband for two whole days, the man’s camouflage caught my eye. Instantly I felt very, very small.
That was a different sort of goodbye.
The woman saying goodbye to her soldier was filled with emotion. I have never experienced what she was feeling, but I can imagine…
I don’t know where he was going. It could be anywhere… But I am sure that their uncertain goodbye was hard. Painful.
Then he stepped aside, and I saw her pregnant belly.
And I don’t know what to say, other than…thank you.
To all of the men and women who serve and defend our nation, and to their families, thank you.
Because, really, I don’t have a clue about saying goodbye.
This post included in Real Life’s Your Life Your Blog.
Twitter: TeriLynneU
says:
I am forwarding this link to my friend Pattie (@pattierwr) who writes for Wives of Faith … a ministry to military wives. I know she will be deeply appreciative. Beautiful, Erin. Thank you for writing this … and may we all realize the thanks our military & their families deserve!!
As a military spouse who recently went through a public goodbye, sending my husband to Afghanistan, thank you! It isn’t often enough that others take a moment to reflect on this intimate part of what our families go through. I appreciate your willingness to truly SEE it, rather than push the memory away because it is uncomfortable or sad. Thank you!
Twitter: nonsensical2
says:
I also have had to say ‘goodbye’ to my husband very rarely in our almost 8 years of marriage. And I have often thought about how hard it must be for those wives that have to…in order for their husbands to go off and fight for my family’s freedom. And you’re right, there doesn’t seem to be anything else to say but thank you, because I honestly can’t begin to imagine what they’re feeling. This was a great post.
Twitter: lorizimbardi
says:
I say goodbye to my hubby every Monday night and he comes home, thankfully every Thursday sometimes Friday night. You are so right! I don’t have it bad at all. I know he is coming home after a few days and even though he heads right back out, he is still in my same time zone and even if he went back east it is only a few hours. I am proud of him and how he takes care of our family but to those who fight for my freedom and the freedom that we enjoy daily, A HUGE THANK YOU!
Twitter: booklover1212
says:
Erin -
Thank you for this. I just brought my soldier home from the airport tonight. I have him home for a week before he has to leave again. It’s not easy, but we get through it.
Hope your time apart goes quickly!!
~ Jennifer
http://thetoyboxyears.blogspot.com
Twitter: dailydwelling
says:
Thank you, Erin for posting this. And thank you for “getting it”. As a military wife, I am so thankful for your appreciation and the friendship you gave to me during my husband’s deployment. It means more than you know that you are thankful for the sacrifices that military families make.
Hi Erin, I know. I have a post in draft of the same thing. Only it was the funeral of a 21 year old soldier. I too felt very small. Thank you for this post.
Yes, thank you and thank you to them all. I have no clue what it would be like, but it has to be hard in so many ways.
I have to say, Thank you for seeing. For writing this. For saying “thank you.” Because many times wives like me don’t hear those words. We do what we have to do, because it’s what our husband’s calling is. To receive support like yours means a lot.
May I link back to this from Wives of Faith? It’s an organization to support and encourage all military wives.
Powerful! Thank you.
Oh how sad is this. Thank you for posting this.
Twitter: thehsdesk
says:
Amen! Beautiful post Erin! It’s not just the soldiers who sacrifice, but the families as well. I want to tell them thank you too.
Beautiful piece!
Ohhhh…..what a sad goodbye!!
I used to HATE saying goodbye to Lo Gung at the airport. He seemed to travel 1-2 weeks out of every month.
Now, I kind of like it when he goes (not NEARLY as often now)…I can feed the kids at 5:30 and stick them in bed at 7 if I feel like it. LOL
Twitter: alyssaavant
says:
That just made my heart drop. I can’t imagine.
As a military wife I would just like to thank YOU for support us. It means more to us than you will ever know.
What a beautiful post. That women has been me and will be me again. It is so nice to hear others recognize what we go through.
At the same time I know when you are not use to having someone gone, 2 days can be hard too.
Twitter: halleeb
says:
That choked me up. What a beautiful post.
Hallee
Followed a link from http://www.Wivesoffaoth.org to get here! Thank you for your kind words. I am a military wife, and have seen my husband off to afghanistan twice in the past year and those are some of the most difficult moments of military life. Thank you for noticing, recognizing that it is not the easiest of days, but we have hope and strength when we know our soldiers are serving for people like you. Thank you!
Powerful, beautiful post! VERY well written.
This was great. I felt what you described as if I was there too. It is very difficult to imagine. How can we compare our pain to the pain a soon-to-be mother feels when she tells her husband goodbye, possibly for the last time? When she sees him leave, she has to wonder whether her baby will grow up without a father, whether she’ll grow old without a husband. The sacrifices military families make for us is beyond measure. Thank you for the wonderful post!
Beautiful post, Erin. BEAUTIFUL. As a military spouse myself, I say thank you for writing this.
Goodbyes stink, no matter how long the separation.
Twitter: wishfulme
says:
Very touching post and I thank YOU for considering another good-bye even in the midst of your own.
Take care!
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
After the back to back deployments equaling 2 years, I would get so irritated when someone would complain about the weekend trip their husband was on. I know it’s all about perspective and military spouses just have a perspective on this subject that very few share. We know what it is like to raise children who only see their daddy via webcams. We know what it is like to be allowed only 15 mins per phone call, knowing full well someone else is listening in the entire time. We know what it is like to have children who breathe their first breath, take their first step, learn to read, celebrate birthdays and holidays all without their daddy there…not because he is busy doing his own thing, but so you can be busy doing your own thing.
Again, thank you for noticing and writing this post.
Amy
Thank you for this beautiful post! I’ve been the military wife saying goodbye too many times in my life and it’s hard even after all this time to comes to terms with.
Thank you so much for your post! I said goodbye to my husband in January for a one-year deployment to Afghanistan. Most people do not understand what the family at home goes through. I cried from the moment we walked out of the door, through the ride, in the airport, and all the way home. I’m glad there are some people out there who do stop and put things into perspective.
Beautiful post . . . . it does put so many things into perspective when we’re reminded of what others sacrifice for us.